That new friend of yours is a complete human.
In the spring of my freshman year of college I met a guy. He was charming and smart and had some of the same interests I had. He was also poly (before I knew I was — and indeed before I even really understood what that meant), and he had a cat to which I was quite allergic. He had expensive tastes and a low-wage job. We dated, and later married, and later divorced. The things I liked about him mostly never changed. And the things I didn’t like about him mostly never changed either.
Long before that, I had a huge crush on a guy who ended up being the incontrovertible evidence that I was poly (throughout my life, I’ve had various partners, dates, lovers — AND this one person I’ve been continuously in love with since 1983). He was (and in many ways still is) irritating AF. He has annoying habits, depressive tendencies, OCD, a girlfriend who hates the fact that I exist even though she actually likes me well enough. He is also gentle, thoughtful, fiercely loyal, and has stayed by my side through seven kinds of hell over the last 38 years.
My current partner has a kinky side that doesn’t happen to work for me, so he does his kinky stuff with other people in other places. For me this means I have a wonderful husband who holds up his half of a marriage and household, is devoted and supportive, and leaves me home alone a couple…
